Lotus Season

Unburying myself from the weight of cognitive dissonance 

Clearing the emotion of the trees so I can see the jewel of my own feelings I’ve kept exclusively forested. 

Coping and not curing moving fast to not deal with shit. Surface level love so we don’t have to dig into where it fits.

Making peace with the battered feminine and toxic male aspects, mending that ego split. 

Sorting through the mud, head held to the sun while I find the parts I lost of me in the fight to bloom out of it.

Fighting with myself in between forcing and flow. Realizing the spectrums of force and resistance in my world as it shows. 

Breaking down the walls, in the sun, water and earth. Nourishment. Clarity, peace. Intentional and unintentional growth. 

Tending everyone else’s field when my field needed nursing. Holding my cup out to be filled. Showing my soul I didn’t think it was perfect.

And I know first hand that love you holdback in giving is a burden...

Beat up on myself and turned the energy on building to the star player within 

Turning what I desire to give out to fortify my confidence and growing in a new skin

Strengthening backbone restoring back and integrating lost pieces everyday 

As I float on this muddy water true Lotus blossom way. 

-Inspired of the fullness of life-

Courtney